Tags: abhoth, acid, adult contemporary, aima, anvil strykez, AOR, aosoth, Atreides, black 'n roll, burial ritual, carnal decay, cryptic brood, czar, deathcore, desolate shrine, drought, female vocals, hard rock, heavy baby sea slugs, illimitable dolor, insanity cult, metalcore, mindful of pripyat, mortifica, nyogthaeblisz, poseurs, post-hardcore, rites of thy degringolade, sadistic metal reviews, screamo, solitary, stadium rock, stench of profit, stoner rock, Summoning, Supremative, synth pop, synthpop, synthwave, the charm the fury, the ossuary, War Metal
Sadistic Metal Reviews: Blood Muzak’s Best
Poseur cash grab Finnish label Blood Music posted his favorites albums of 2017 recently on his Mosh Core Trends Fun book page. Nobody needs a 24 LP boxed set of Emperor (Only need In the Nightside Eclipse and Wrath of the Tyrant / Emperor compilation CD) featuring rehearsals of Ihsahn’s mom telling Emperor to stop dressing up like The Lost Boys and nobody needs anything on this poseur’s shilling list. Nobody wants to pay to join Blood Music’s fan club to buy his hipster merchandise. Blood Music should go shoot himself. A hollow point to the back of the head gets the job done as he has to blow up his shill lizard brain to make sure he dies for good. Do it.
44 CommentsTags: 2017, blood music, cash grab, cormorant, crypto-indie, danger, elder, Enslaved, hipster, indie rock, jeremy enigk, master boot record, metalcore, poseur, poseurs, sadistic metal reviews, septic flesh, septicflesh, shills, slowdive, sludge, stoner rock, techno, the faceless
2018 Decibel Magazine Tour Has No Metal Bands
Decibel Magazine and Albert Mudrian have long been known as poseurs and shills.
6 CommentsTags: albert mudrian, alternative rock, blast beat network, crypto-indie, decibel, Enslaved, hipster bullshit, indie rock, khemmis, Myrkur, news, non metal metal pop crap, poseurs, shills, stoner rock, tour dates, upcoming tour, US tour, wolves in the throne room
Sadistic Metal Reviews: The Big Sleep for Bandcamp
It is time to put the piss-poor recommendations of these bonzos to bed. Forever.
34 CommentsTags: bandcamp, blood incantation, boring, dead congregation, death metal, deathcore, encoffination, Father Befouled, Grave Miasma, grave upheaval, incantation, Portal, poseurs, sadistic metal reviews, stoner doom, stoner rock
Sadistic Metal Reviews: Zyklon B For Bandcamp
Hipster and poseur blood must be shed!
53 CommentsTags: 2017, attic, bandcamp, black 'n roll, boris, cavernlight, converge, couch slut, crypto-indie, death 'n' roll, death yell, deathcore, encoffination, Father Befouled, green druid, heresiarch, hipster bullshit, impalers, impetuous ritual, incantation, jute gyte, khazaddum, khemmis, mathcore, metalcore, mutoid man, necrot, one master, palmistry, posers, poseurs, pyrrhon, sadistic metal reviews, scenesters, sempiternal dusk, spirit adrift, stoner rock, tchornobog, walpyrgus, wrest
Angel Witch August 2017 England Tour With Electric Wizard
New Wave of British Heavy Metal legends Angel Witch are touring England this August, opening up for stoner rock band Electric Wizard.
No CommentsTags: Angel Witch, electric wizard, england, hard rock, Heavy Metal, news, NWOBHM, stoner doom, stoner rock, tour, tour dates, united kingdom, upcoming tours
Metal Molester 2017 So Far SMR
As these Observer posers speed past 2017’s halfway point, they present a selection that is indeed a dumpster fire representative of the shit pool that their mainstream metal listening provides them with. Only those who need to be eradicated (rapists, communists, child molesters, serial killers, hipsters, etc.) genuinely think that stoner rock and boring, slow heavy rock bands are examples of heavy metal. Their piss-poor “culling” (badass, huh?) from the “metal cauldron” of mee-maw’s recipes was as follows:
7 CommentsTags: 2017, AIDS, artificial brain, aseethe, brandon seabrook, cinema cinema, endon, GRID, hipster idiocy, john frum, kelly moran, luminous vault, metalcore, observer, poser metal, posers, poseur metal, poseurs, sadistic metal reviews, screamo, stoner rock, techdeaf, tek-deth, toby dive
Indie Blog Laments as Maryland Deathfest is Mainstreamed
The hilarious leftist parody of metal will be celebrated in force this weekend as Maryland Deathfest completes its transformation into Coachilla-lite. While it’s been painfully obvious that all festival culture has gone fully mainstream as futureless millennials continue to spend money they don’t have on things they don’t need there are still many in the hipster sphere that can’t grasp the loss of counter culture to the mainstream. Maryland Deathfest continues this trend with praise from mainstream propaganda editorial Newsweek and lamentations from liberal snowflake blog Invisible Oranges occurring in the same week.
8 CommentsTags: festivals, funderground, hipster idiocy, Invisible Oranges, mainstream, mainstream metal, maryland death fest, maryland deathfest, sjw metal, sjws, social justice warriors, stoner doom, stoner rock
Crackhead Bobby Liebling Assaults Elderly Mother
Former and probably current crack smoker Bobby Liebling of long running stoner rock, pseudo-metal band Pentagram was arrested for apparently assaulting his elderly mother, causing him to be dropped from Pentagram’s upcoming European tour. Liebling famously was filmed smoking crack in his elderly parents’ basement in suburban Maryland for the Pentagram documentary Last Days Here. Liebling’s drug problems and abhorrent personal behavior have long sabotaged any chance Pentagram may have had at creative of commercial success.
7 CommentsTags: bobby liebling, cocaine, crime, drugs, hard rock, heroin, hipster idiocy, pentagram, stoner, stoner rock, worthless scum
Stoner Rock Is Not “Doom Metal”
Earlier this year, independent music distribution platform Bandcamp claimed that many stoner rock bands are in fact doom metal. This is a common logical fallacy based around associating the pace and instrumental tone of the music with actual musical content. The stoner “doom” trend of bands that started in the late 90s and early 2000s and has continued non-stop right up until the present almost twenty years later was one of the earliest hipster attempts to assimilate heavy metal before the waves of speed, death, and now black metal aesthetics rehashed into pop rock for the safe space generation.
26 CommentsTags: bandcamp, candlemass, doom, Doom Metal, hard rock, hipster bullshit, hipster idiocy, hipster invasion, idiots, pentagram, posers, poseurs, saint vitus, stoner, stoner doom, stoner rock