The Musician’s Guide to SJW Values

Metal, like punk, once a lawless wild west where no attitude or ideology was unwelcome or too extreme.  But after hipsters unifed the masses of 90’s counter cultures into one mainstream culture, a far left ideology was adopted by and heavily policed within nearly every sub/counter cultural music genre (metal included).  Despite this being the exact opposite of what metal has been about for many decades, the desperation to fit in has left many of the aging neckbeard social outcast fake metalheads to adopt this heinous bastardization of music’s most honest genre and collectively enforce these new mainstream social rules.  And just like in the mainstream culture of today, breaking any of these rules (or having broken them in the past before these social norms were instituted) is designated with a swift lifetime band from showing yourself in public in the U.S.

Lately, a lot of metal bands have  been getting in trouble for doing things that progressive liberal culture finds unacceptable.  Many bands have been confused by the rules, as progressive liberal logic is absolutely nonsensical,  and therefore musicians struggle with the details behind this new social paradigm.  Having fought the left in our culture war for several years now and being often confronted with these nutcases, I determined it would be in the best interest of metal’s very badass musicians understand what crimes and behaviors are okay.  Please find below, a very thoroughly researched look into the disturbed mind of Social Justice Warriors:

Chart 1: Individual’s Morality

Crime/Behavior                                                                                  Acceptable?

MURDER                                                                                                      YES

ASSAULT (MALE VICTIM)                                                                      YES

ASSAULT (FEMALE VICTIM)                                                                 NO (Unless you’re signed to Profound Lore)

THEFT                                                                                                           YES

BESTIALITY                                                                                                 YES

PEDOPHILIA                                                                                               NO (Unless you write for MetalSucks)

GRAVE ROBBERY                                                                                      YES

SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT MEN                                                 YES

SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT WOMEN                                         NO (Unless you write for MetalSucks)

SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT WHITES                                          YES

SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT ANY OTHER RACE                     NO (Unless you’re signed to Profound Lore)

SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT CHRISTIANS                                 YES

SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT ANY OTHER RELIGION             NO

SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT LGTBTQ                                          NO

 

(more…)

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The New Ten Commandments

The former Ten Commandments were designed for societies not in decline. In the midst of the death of the West, I suggest the following:

Original Older
1. You shall have no other gods before Me. 1. Ignore all gods but reality. This includes God, who is part of reality.
2. You shall make no idols. 2. (this one stands as is)
3. You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain. 3. If you encounter the Buddha on the path to your objective, KILL HIM.
4. Keep the Sabbath day holy. (this one stands as is)
5. Honor your father and your mother. 5. Honor your father and your mother insofar as they are realistic. This is especially relevant to Generation X. If your Boomerparents are insane, ignore them.
6. You shall not murder. (this one stands as is, with clarification that murder = unwarranted killing; self-defense and idiot removal are other stories)
7. You shall not commit adultery. (this one stands as is; one man, one wife, one eternal love, all else needs to burn)
8. You shall not steal. (this one stands as is)
9. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor. (this one stands as is)
10. You shall not covet. (this one stands as is; it is perhaps the best advice in the Bible — when one ceases to covet, one focuses on adaptation instead of scapegoating)
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VH1 “journalist” launches smear campaign against Bard Eithun

VH1 logo
VH1 affiliated journalist (and I feel guilty for using that term, because seriously, it’s VH1) Zack Sigel apparently was inspired by the recent Disma controversy, and has set his targets on Bard “Faust” Eithun in what is almost certainly an attempt to get his current projects (Blood Tsunami, Studfaust, etc.) pulled from the upcoming Martyrdoom Festival. Unlike Craig Pillard, Faust admittedly does have a criminal record to his name, having been imprisoned for the murder of a homosexual some years ago, but this doesn’t make the apparent goal any more noble. Whether or not Faust is the same person he was 20 years ago, witch hunting is not going to actually reform him, or usher in any sort of actual justice or utopian tolerant social justice city on a hill. Most of this article, however, isn’t a call to action against Faust, although the passages specifically condemning Faust’s actions come off as passive-aggressive at best. Instead, Sigel dedicates most of the article to whining about metalheads not immediately condemning bands for their ideological stances. Ironically he also pushes Deafheaven, despite their own ties to right wing movements, but odds are he won’t be turning on them for that any time soon, lest the ensuing cognitive dissonance explodes and kills everyone in a 500 mile radius.

We’re probably enabling him by acknowledging this article, but if nobody calls out this sort of pseudo-tolerant hypocrisy, everyone gets burnt.

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#Metalgate: Jimi Hendrix, Nazi collector

jimi_hendrix_-_nazi_artifacts

An astute reader spotted this picture of Jimi Hendrix, and in the spirit of #metalgate showing us the more complex world than the good/bad binary in which commerce and ideology define it, revealed this about what’s going on in this picture:

PC police and SJWs look away now. Apparently Jimi Hendrix collected Nazi stuff. In this Retronaut photo of his 34 Montague Square flat’s wall: Luftwaffe Flying Clasp (unknown mission and grade), Krim shield, DAK/Army pith helmet eagle and national colors shields, and Mother’s Cross. To the right, a fireman’s dress bayonet with portapee. Japanese Samurai sword hilt visible above the bookshelf, too. Reckon Jimi and Lemmy talked about more than just scoring drugs.

‘Scuse me while I sieg this heil, eh, Jimi?

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Bolivian metal band mixes native instruments, modern technique

bolivia-heavy-metal
Photo: New York Times.

One of the better developments during the past decade is that it’s now acceptable to talk about heavy metal in the mainstream press as something other than entertainment. It might even have, you know, artistic or cultural value and stuff.

A recent attempt looks at the heavy metal of Bolivia, which combines native instruments with modern underground metal technique:

The band members wore black. The lead singer screamed into his microphone and whipped his long, black hair around. The guitarists clawed at their instruments. The drummer pounded with fury. And then the panpipe player took his solo, and the fans packed into the mosh pit went into a frenzy…those songs, characterized by the use of the panpipe, known as the zampoña, and a wooden flute called a quena, have a special impact among fans.

The article makes the point that the hybrid style is more accepted among many of the people there, and that it directly references Incan cultural ideas including the ancient moral code that still lives on today in Bolivia.

Our question is: if it’s art, culture and morality there, why isn’t it art, culture and morality here?

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