You might ask yourself, “What the heck is that thing?”

According to its creators, it’s an Asp-burger, a neologism of asparagus and burger.

They didn’t understand when I began barking like a seal, rocking back and forth, stimming and solving complex math problems.

As regular users of our forum, or “Aspies,” know, Asperger’s Syndrome is a bullshit psychological catch-all term for mildly autistic people who are also smart.

Currently our psychological establishment, who have absolutely nothing to gain by removing diagnoses and instead prescribing 20 years of therapy at $150 an hour, are considering removing it as a category of mental illness.

In the meantime, it seems to me that society itself is spergin’ out. Would you like more Coca-Cola with that obsessive need for control, or perhaps more television in stead of bouncing your leg up and down, or indeed some sports events to shout random words at?