How to know your genre is being assimilated

If you needed confirmation the proles are running the show:

Like a stunning, stylized nightmare, Mike Hill’s first ground-rattling growl on Path of Totality is “CHAOS REIGNS.” It’s enough to conjure that memorable scene from Lars Von Trier’s controversial film, Antichrist, in which a self-disemboweling fox cryptically and prophetically utters these two words to Willem Defoe’s character. If anything, it sets the tone for a dark, fully absorbing listen on Tombs’ second album.

With Path of Totality, out June 7, the Brooklyn metal trio takes its disparate influences and distills an expansive palette using thick, controlled brushstrokes. The industrial sledgehammer of Godflesh meets the blast-beated darkness of early Darkthrone in “To Cross the Land,” while “Vermillion” intones a sinister psychedelic swirl over an impressive rhythm section preparing for war. The atmospheric Goth-rock of The Cure presides over “Passageways” and “Black Heaven,” as the dead-eyed stare of Swans — the members of Tombs are admittedly huge fans — lurks in unlit corridors. But while the band’s wide-ranging music libraries are on display, Path of Totality functions as something new, mostly because its extremity is tempered by a dynamic push and pull, accentuated by the spacious production of John Congleton, whose diverse clientele includes Explosions in the Sky, Baroness, Modest Mouse and St. Vincent. – National People’s Radio

Wow, look it has lots of different stuff in it. Translation: no direction.

Looks like a big-name indie producer made it. Translation: “post-metal” means indie with slow drums and distortion.

It’s on NPR. Translation: it’s OK by government and industry, thus as far from underground as you can get, no matter how underground it pretends to be.

0 thoughts on “How to know your genre is being assimilated”

  1. Metal Nigger says:

    This article is elitist and everyone who visits this site are shit.

  2. Kontinual Adventures says:

    What is Kontinual doing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed?
    A: He’s trying to watch himself sleep.

    Kontinual is walking down the street with a parrot on his shoulder. A curious woman asks him: “Does that animal talk?” “I’m not sure” the parrot responds.

    Kontinual ordered a pizza. When asked if he wanted the pizza sliced in six or twelve slices, he replied: “Only six slices man, I don’t think I could eat twelve”.

    A helicopter crashes in a cemetery. It is reported that 64 dead were wounded, and yeah Kontinual is a moron.

    The good think about Kontinual Adventures is that they are not jokes but anecdotes.

  3. born after 1987 says:

    I’m so sad Jon Nödtveidt is dead. He was one of the last true black metallers!

  4. Levy_Spearmen says:

    We want Kontinual epithets!

  5. fuck off you fag poser says:

    @ born after 1987
    I’m so sad you’ve down-syndrome, you’ll tell people you like metal music and then all their prejudices will be legitimized.

  6. Adrian McCoy says:

    Why don’t you take your anger out to the sites of such speech? It’s a little more productive than merely sticking to the wankery and autofellatio of this website.

  7. retarded buttpirate says:

    HAR HAR HAR!!! BEND OVER YOUNG LADDY AND LET ME SAIL ME MEATSHIP INTO YOUR HAIRLESS HARBOR!! HAR HAR HAR!!! YA LIKE THAT DUN’T YA? STAP CRYING FER FOCKS SAKE LADDY! YA WANTED TO BE A PIRATE DEEDN’T YA? HAR HAR HAR!!!

  8. Jack Sparrow says:

    ^Alestorm could use that for a refrain !

  9. half nigger, half polak; all gay says:

    New Morbid Angel giving me serious boners! First time I listened to ‘I’m Morbid’ I had to masturbate in a bucket of kfc to calm down, then shove a sausage up my anus. You’re just a bunch of elitist nerds, the new M.A. is really innovative an’ shit. Superficially, aesthetically – it’s so unique!

  10. Mohammed Atta says:

    KILL THEM MUTHAFUCKIN’ INDIES!

    BACK TO OBITUARY ’89, “ALTARS OF MADNESS” AND DISEMBOWELMENT!

    AND CRASH THE WHOLE GADDAFI AIRFORCE UNTO ALL THE SHITTY RADIO STATIONS OFFERING SUCH A CRAP TO THE BORN AFTER 1987 SCUMKIDS.

    :)

  11. Shut up Brett says:

    “It’s on NPR. Translation: it’s OK by government and industry, thus as far from underground as you can get, no matter how underground it pretends to be.”

    C’mon, we all know Brett Stevens is a Christian who if he ruled America would turn it back into a 40’s, 50’s ideal. So whether they’re approved by NPR or not, the ANUS staff are a bunch of moralist who’ve assimilated a culture that completely is against what they stand for. Most metalheads/bands are angry, porn watching drug abusers. Anus.com staff are elitist douchebags who get their anus bleached every and claim their nihilist but they’re “trascendental atheist”. Does this add up? No.

  12. you SUCK says:

    This blog article (not the one being quoted) is so eye-rollingly insipid I groaned out loud while reading it. Metal was never underground you dumb faggots, it was ALWYAS OK by government and industry or Judas Priest would have never gotten their shitty videos about 14 year olds playing arcade games (their mainstay audience to this day) aired on MTV.

  13. you SUCK says:

    I was eating my own ass when I wrote the previous comment. 4give ME

  14. you SUCK says:

    No I wasn’t, you fucking liar!

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