The world will get it’s first real dose of 2018 metal on Friday with a massive drop of releases. Let’s take a look at what’s coming and see if metal this year will be as bad as the last one.
7 CommentsTags: Bind Torture Kill, Black Metal, death metal, deathgrind, Doomdeath, Hooded Menace, metal, news, phil anselmo, Portal, upcoming releases, vardan
Death looms over thrash metal’s most sinister (and probably most influential) band: Slayer. After 35 years of touring and recording, the demise of the band’s most valuable member Jeff Hanneman, and age coupled with 25 years of creative rut, Slayer is about to expire. The band announced via a short video that it’s time for one last ride before a long overdue end.
11 CommentsTags: death, demise, End, jeff hanneman, kerry king, metal, retirement, slayer, thrash metal
When riding the subway in a major American city one is likely to encounter a homeless person panhandling for money. There is usually a canned speech of sorts that may or may not sound something like this:
“Hi my name is Daniel. I am homeless. I lost my job, I am cold, and I am hungry with no food to eat. Please donate whatever you can so I can eat. God bless.”
When I see musicians and journalists advertising Kickstarter, Patreon, and other fundrasing campaigns I hear the same speech in my head. This speech sounds something along the lines of:
12 Comments“Hi my name is Daniel. I am a musician. I have no job, I am cold, and I am unmedicated with no Starbucks Frappacino to drink. Please donate money so I can record a blatantly mediocre album that I will also charge you for. I will hate you if you do not give me this money.”
Tags: hipsters, Kickstarter, narcissism, Paetron, poverty, Trendkillers
2017 was a shit waste of a year when it came to metal music. Yet with a whole generation of useless neckbeard millennials frantically trying to pursue a career in metal journalism via a desperate pursuit of vindication from that $40,000 of communications-degree student loan debt we have hundreds of “best metal albums” lists every year.
9 CommentsTags: Altarage, byzantine, Code Orange, Cvlt Nation, decibel, fake metal news, fake news, fake news awards, hipsters, incineration, metal hammer, MetalSucks, paradise lost, rape, rolling stone, sadistic metal reviews, The Contortionist, Trump
It’s here! YouTube’s rapidly accelerating censorship committee has finally begun targeting musicians with their Orwellian “hate speech” laws. Pandering to the advertisers that have quietly bought the operations of Silicon Valley tech companies and the souls of all Silicon Valley employees, YouTube has begun a fascist campaign of censoring any videos that may cause trouble for any company that may accidentally place an ad on it. So far this has primarily targeted vloggers for (conservative) wrongthink- videos portraying horrifically offensive hatred such as statistics, scientific research, or biological facts. Yet strangely, the first band in the greater sphere of heavy music that YouTube has gone after is a modern nu-metal/rap rock band who, in all honesty, looks pretty leftist….
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Tags: 2018, big tech, cesorship, communism, news, tolaterian
Grammy-award wining artist Watain has shamelessly assumed the mantle of “most embarrassing band masquerading as black metal” previously shared by Dimmu Borgir and Cradle of Filth. Where the downfall of those two bands was an overdose of gothic and groove influences, Watain has managed to outdo both in both parody and bastardization of black metal with their previous album’s venture into country musical territory. With a career built on celebrity guest spots from more capable underground metal musicians, necrophiliac 1st era Bathory Worship mixed with a second rate attempt to mimic Dissection’s concluding album, and a ridiculously cartoonist theatrical performance worthy of a Broadway musical, Watain’s legacy has been secured to forever be “the band that bent over farthest to inherit the phallus of commercialization the deepest” and has effectively decimated any hope of legitimacy the sub genre might have had in the post-90s. With a brash new attestation in the form of Trident Wolf Apocalypse the truth could not possibly be more clear to any listener with knowledge of black and death metal: Watain are the biggest joke in all of black metal history.
14 CommentsTags: 2010s, 2018, bad music, Black Metal, Broadway Musicals, carnival, cash grab, clowns, crap, defecation, feces, hipsters, mayhem, metal, poop, posers, revenge, shit, Trident Wolf Eclipse, watain
A few times every decade, a work of literature or film comes along that astonishingly predicts the future with unbelievable accuracy. Back in 1994, we were given a dead-on glimpse of the social climate that we’re currently living in across modern western civilization through a seemingly harmless silly, good times college comedy, as it advertised itself to be. But instead, PCU showed us the world we would be inhabiting twenty years later.
10 CommentsTags: 90s, alt-right, antifa, culture wars, film, lifestyle, PCU, political correctness, sjws, social justice warriors, Trump, war
Immortal is back! Well… sort of. Halfway there. Right? In name at least?
You see, Demonaz- Immortal’s original guitarist during the 90’s, lyricist during the 2000’s, and now vocalist/guitarist and lyricist in the 2010s- is back with drummer-on-some-albums skinsman Horgh. Wait, actually, the two have only played together on one album (out of twelve) so can they really “be back?” Anyway, Demonaz and Horgh have out-lawyered the band’s drugged out drunken cornerstone musician Abbath, who played every instrument except for guitar when Demonaz was in the band and then played guitar over 9000 times better than Demonaz once the latter got a case of tendentious. With the name locked down and a healthy Nuclear Blast Records budget, the duo get ready to make a seriously play for the wallets of misguided fans.
But wait, the tendentious that crippled him for a decade is suddenly gone? Can he still pick at the rediculous guitar tempos of Blizzard Beasts? Can he even play at all? There’s a lot to unpack in this one, so let’s get trolling as we recap the story of the band who turned black metal’s creepy aesthetics into the hair metal of the 90s…
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Tags: 2018, abbath, agent orange, Black Metal, Blashyrkh, Blizzard Beasts, cash grab, death metal general, Demonaz, emperor, grim and cold, grim and frostbitten, grim and nipply, holograms, horgh, immortal, lawyers, metal, mortiis, new album, news, Obsessed by Cruelty, sellout, sodom
The Talk:
Every metal musician needs to have “The Talk” at some point or another and for some of you, this will be that moment. In the world of metal, “The Talk” is the soul crashing, dream obliterating conversation where one learns the valuable lesson that you can’t get rich playing extreme metal. It’s heartbreaking and defeating but better learned sooner than later. And since a young ambitious musician isn’t necessarily considering the logistics, lifestyle goals, etc. of their future before they drill on that pentagram neck tattoo, I want to make sure readers of DMU are abundantly clear on what to expect on the financial front when engaging in life as a touring musician.
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Tags: At the Gates, Black Metal, cannibal corpse, children of bodom, cradle of filth, dark tranquility, death metal, economics, gorgoroth, immolation, mayhem, metal, motorhead, music business, music industry, necrophagist, poverty, Thy Art is Murder, truth, watain, wealth, whitechapel
As I predicted a few weeks ago with 100% accuracy all charges of rape, kidnapping, and sexual assault have been dropped against the four members of Decapitated. The collateral damage done to the band is going to remain however as this news (published on a Saturday when little mind is paid to the news cycle) will surely receive significantly less buzz than the breaking story of their arrest, or the subsequent leftist metal media narrative that a guilty plea should be expected based on a ridiculous interview with some dingbat attorney who had absolutely no access to any of the evidence. This will therefore result in many of the fans who have disowned them to continue believing them to be heartless rapists. The band can expect extradition back to Poland soon, having very harshly learned a tough but important lesson. This story is an important lesson to metal concertgoers and even more so to young metal musicians who will be touring or playing shows soon. Let’s briefly examine how this story was treated by the liberal MSMM (mainstream metal media) and its fans, take a deeper look at the takeaways that can be learned from this unfortunate experience, and conclude with an open letter to the members of Decapitated I once shared a bottle of vodka with some years ago…
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Tags: crime, death metal, deathcore, decapitated, liberals, metal, metalgate, MetalSucks, metoo, progressive liberals, rape, sjws
