Sadistic Metal Reviews: Flavor of the Week Metal Pt 2: Death Metal

Last month we ran the first  of a two part series on flavor of the week metal subgenres, focusing soley on black metal. The plan was to release a second edition a week later, but the Tulio Baars DDOS attacks prevented that from happening. That is, until now…
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Brett Stevens: “We’re a Threat to the Narrative”

In his first interview since the annoying DDOS attacks of sad vandalist loser Tulio Baars, alpha badass DMU founder Brett Stevens sits down with Identity Rising Podcast to discuss why his sites became the most dangerous on the internet.  Also discussed is the evolution and future of the dissident right, the Detroiting of society, and a newfound quest of the Alt Right to restore Western civilization.  The pair briefly touch on the miserable leftists who hired Tulio and their odd decision to go after Death Metal Underground instead of, I don’t know, actual hate sites?

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SCAM ALERT: Via Nocturna Records

Despite the vitriolic hatred, nihilism, and misanthropy that death and black metal music is known for many artists/fans/labels have a developed a pretty blind system of trust and assumptions.  This code of honor stems from a general assumption of a “metal brotherhood” along with the idea that beatings or some other justice would be served in the event anyone acting out of line while also publicly listing their address online.  However the extreme metal scene has seen many legendary rip-off artists ranging from Peruvian fat-girl-fucker Christian Felipe Paucar Toledo, Nachmystium’s Blake Judd and his Battlekommand Records (now Ascension Monuments Media), and Blake’s drug addicted sidkick crony Jeff Wilson and his Disorder Recordings/Design.  To date, none of these men have been beaten within an inch of their life despite robbing and conning people in droves, and all of them continue to tour and sell music.  Therefore, ripping people off appears to carry no penalty, or at least within the boundaries of the metal world.

Many musicians on Bandcamp have reported they are receiving an emails from a “label” calling itself Via Nocturnal Records.  The label starts off with an obviously generic message saying they want to release the band’s music on CD.  After responding positively indicating interest, the label now sends the bait for a really outrageous and embarrassing metal scam.

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1983

A footnote in an article we ran last week sparked a lot of controversy among our very passionate friends who lurk the DMU comment sections.  No, it wasn’t that we correctly identified SJW journalists as the nail in the coffin of metal as we know it; instead it was an observation of the last death of heavy metal:

In the early 1970s, heavy metal was an exciting new musical and cultural movement. So much so, that it surpassed even rock music (thought to be revolutionary just a few years before). But towards the end of the decade came a near-lethal blow: punk rock. Faster, louder, more abrasive and aggressive, punk had risen the bar and metal couldn’t compete. From 1977-1983, metal was almost completely obliterated. Many had declared the movement dead – a fleeting flavor of the week experiment that did not stand the test of time.

Many took issue with this: “metal wasn’t dead!”  they cried.  “Albums were released, things happened!”  “You’re erasing history Brock, your articles ruined this site and my life!”

The intrigue and utter distraction of this phrase sparked the need to further elaborate:  Did metal actually die, during this time period, or did I somehow just miss a few years of quality metal development?

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Did Rock & Metal Engineer Societal Destruction?

What do Jonathan Davis, Corey Taylor, and Scott Weiland have in common?  Answering the question “90 Hard Rock singers” would not be incorrect, but there’s something darker beneath the surface – all three men are rape victims.  Davis even documents the experience in graphic detail in a platinum selling album from his band, and many of Taylors lyrics are riddled with sexual abuse.

Why were the executives of the murder industry so keen on pushing rape victims as the new face of rock n’ roll?  Furthermore, why were the most popular genres of rock and metal so lyrically obsessed with self destruction?  From Grunge “morality is useless and life is hopeless” to Nu Metal “I’m a freak and everyone hates me” to Emo and Screamo “I’m lonely and will never be loved” to indie (soy) metal and rock “We failed to be what we should have been” the message of mainstream rock and metal music has constantly be one of self destruction.  This trend is mirrored by a 25% increase in American suicides in American suicides since the 1990s:

Suicide rates increased by 25% across the United States over nearly two decades ending in 2016, according to research published Thursday by the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Twenty-five states experienced a rise in suicides by more than 30%, the government report finds.

More than half of those who died by suicide had not been diagnosed with a mental health condition, said Dr. Anne Schuchat, principal deputy director of the CDC.

“These findings are disturbing. Suicide is one of the top 10 causes of death in the US right now, and it’s one of three causes that is actually increasing recently, so we do consider it a public health problem — and something that is all around us,” Schuchat said. The other two top 10 causes of death that are on the rise are Alzheimer’s disease and drug overdoses, she noted.

With statistics like this, it’s absolutely time to panic: our society is being marred by growing influences- intentional or not – to destroy ourselves.  Let’s examine music’s relationship to this now obvious horror and see if we can determine why this is happening.

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On The Ending Of American Psycho (2000)

The classic film portrayal of Bret Easton Ellis’s viciously dark novel American psycho has an incredibly open-ended ending that ultimately leaves the film’s conclusion up to the viewers. Chronicling the growing insanity of Christian Bale’s outstanding Patrick Bateman character, the film never makes a firm establishment of how real any of what we were seeing actually was. After eluding what seemed like certain doom in the form of confessing a massive killing spree to his lawyer, Bateman himself wonders if his murders really did happen.

This leaves the opportunity to make a case for three different theories:

  1. Bateman committed none of the murders, all of them happened inside of his mind.
  2. Bateman committed some of the murders, but hallucinated the others.
  3. Bateman committed all of the murders.

My belief was always the least popular of these three theories, but before I elaborate let’s take a moment to examine the other two.

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Vacation’s Over

Ass-tier beta male hacker Tulio Baars ran out of money to keep knocking Death Metal Underground offline. Tulio, you feminine slab of loserdom, that’s all ya got? All that “special Google and NASA training” for a couple weeks of 404? Was it really worth destroying your career for that, as any future employer will google your name and see the related pictures? Did the Brazil trucker strikes knock your village’s power offline, did you get starved off by the lack of food? Will you be taking a helicopter ride once the Third Empire of Brazil is instated in the Chilean fashion?

Tulio, my man, I’m disappointed. I was really enjoying my vacation time, got some beach time in with my hot trad waifu, even got to try that new Mediterranean place down on 66th and 2nd. But now thanks to your technical shortcomings, it looks it’s back to work for me and the DMU staff.

Thanks to all our readers for your patience, with full assumptions that you had better shit to do than to keep entering deathmetal.org into your browsers every few hours. Also, thanks to everyone who visited us at our DMU in exile 8chan board at www.8ch.net/deathmetal/ and went ruthless with the shitposting. Perhaps we will keep it up, and make some rounds there. Barring any more whiny techfag meltdowns, DMU will be back to the usual sadism and destruction tomorrow with an immeasurably stronger resolve and more beta male smashing mayhem. Lefties, soy metallers, fake metal news outlets, and social justice warriors on suicide watch!!! Sodomize the weak!!!

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The War Continues: Temporary Solutions to the DMU Cyberwar

While some loser-in-life Huffington Post reporter named Tulio Baars (the magazine does not typically employ males) continues spending his mommy and daddy’s money on a botnet to launch cyber attacks on Death Metal Underground, a temporary backup solution has been created for Hessians to get their fix of metal chaos and destruction.

An official DMU 8chan imageboard has been created and can be found at https://8ch.net/deathmetal and we’ll host all of our articles there for the time being until the Brasilia Policia catch up with Tulio.  On this board anyone (including readers) can make posts there or engage in articles.  Just don’t be a pussy!

And for the record, DMU is not- nor ever was- an Alt-Right or white nationalist website.  We have never once have written about race.  So if you think you’re a left-wing liberal crusader doing the word a service by shutting down a niche metal website you’re just retarded and probably confused about your sexual orientation.

For everyone else, thanks for still visiting here despite these pansies knocking the site offline for a couple of weeks.

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