An Involution of Easter

Bill and Ted found themselves wandering through the middle east, somewhere. The time machine had finally shorted out when Ted connected it to his iPad, causing a brief detour through 1968 Christopher Street in New York and a Royal Navy frigate in 1780 at rum ration time before crashing somewhere into this Semitic wonderland.

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Community Activism: Make Google Translate Recognize Our Motto

In the past, this site — the Dark Legions Archive and its new extension in the Death Metal Underground — was once part of a larger site which we shall not name (which itself arose out of distant nerddom) and together, the users of those communities would come together to make change in the world.

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Sodomize The Weak


Since “sodomize the weak” has become the unofficial motto of this site, and we rarely make such things official because formalization leads to accelerated decrepitude, it makes sense to explain why these three words encompass the single bit of philosophy that every sane person needs.

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Pale Existence Re-Releases “Dark Sanctuary” Demo (1994)

Experimental underground metal band Pale Existence has re-issued its 1994 demo cassette “Dark Sanctuary” in digital form. This allows a new generation to hear the music that borrowed from doom metal, early black metal, melodic death metal and abrasive deathgrind to create a vision of desolation and emptiness that mirrored the downfall of Western Civilization.

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Death Metal Underground Tshirts Are Here


Our first round of Death Metal Underground tshirts have arrived and can be yours within only a few days. Thanks to Cliff Kemple and the team at T.C. West Graphics, these tshirts are pro-printed Port & Co. “Core Blend” 50% cotton/50% polyester tshirts with the Death Metal Underground logo on the front and an inspirational message on the back.

All are size XL to fit giant Viking metalheads. We ship first class in sturdy packaging that is totally not discrete so your neighbors know that you worship Satan, Darwin and Nietzsche on the altar of the music of the undead ancients, or words to that effect. This first batch is not huge, so if you want one, speak up sooner rather than later!

SOLD OUT! — for now.

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Rotten Copper Unleashes “Live Among The Ruins” From The Toxic Wasteland Jams

Collapse rock band Rotten Copper emits small blips of its chaos live recording The Toxic Wasteland Jams through obscure pathways. Most recently, the video for the song “Live Among The Ruins” has touched down with a new video. In the video it is the year 2035. The world has crumbled. Only skaters and metal-heads remain. And they are threatened by not just a civilization in decline, but something not entirely human lurking among the dark places of the earth.

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Infamous / Winter Blackness Split Symbols Of Scarlet Revenge Released

Underground black metal traditionalists Infamous and Polish black metal act Winter Blackness have released a new split album, Symbols of Scarlet Revenge, on vinyl and cassette tape. (more…)

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Marijuana

Some time ago, metalheads at a concert lit up a dingy joint, covered with pocket lint and packed full of brick weed, the uncured Cannabis Sativa grown wild in large Mexican fields and then compressed in trash compactors, crushing the seeds and stems and infusing the psychoactive flowers with oils and plant sugars.

There is only one way to smoke weed:

  1. Get a good night’s sleep.
  2. Wake up and down 15 ounces of water.
  3. Make strong coffee and have two cups.
  4. Take a shotglass of strong alcohol or have a glass of wine or large beer.
  5. Carefully extract and shred a fine Cannabis Indica or Sativa hybrid (60-40 or more).
  6. Mix in 15% of a strong but non smoke cured tobacco.
  7. Place in a bong that has large capacity but allows a fast shotgun.
  8. Take three of these rips within ten minutes.

At this point, the psychedelic potential of the weed becomes most powerful. Synergistic effects with Nicotine, Caffeine and alcohol aid this process.

Repeat as necessary at two-hour intervals.

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Interview With A Tobacconist

Our world has submerged itself in functionalism because it fears the inequality involved when some people enjoy themselves and others have to work or suffer the consequences of their abilities or decisions. This has created a kind of totalitarian worker’s commune where pleasure is demonized, except for certain forms which help people go back to work, and work is praised as a type of new religion. As part of this ascetic dogmatism, pipes and cigars have been hunted to near-extinction by regulators, complainers, private businesses and whiny NGOs. A London woman named Shorty, one of the rare breed of independent tobacconists still extant as an endangered species in the modern world, agreed to answer some of our questions about her world of pipes, tobacco and Brexit…

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